My greatest fear
My greatest fear is being alone. i e tdont like to be alone. i like to be with people, my friends, my family. i liko talk with them, laugh, chat and play. i dont like to do stuff alone, i like to do stuff with someone. When i play video games, i like to play it with my brother kevin. when he doesn't like to play, if feel alone. :( i would go to my room and lie down. when he likes to play, i am happy. :)
2 comments:
Hi Renee! Just a few comments on your writing:
1. Learn to proofread! You have some typo errors.
2. Always begin a sentence with a CAPITAL letter. The pronoun "I" should also be capitalized.
3. "When i play video games, i like to play it with my brother kevin. when he doesn't like to play, if feel alone." -> You can still divide this into two sentences. It's too long and has too many ideas!
ang gulo
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